Everything changed for me in college, I wish I could say I deserved all the good things that have happened to me and that I worked hard to achieve what I have achieved. I’d be lying though, it was God all along. Every time he has opened my eyes to the greater purpose I could have for my life, I have forcefully shut them again and gone down the wrong path. I was part of a christian organization in college called Campus Crusade for Christ. Through my years as part of that organization, I became more and more prideful, to the point where I would think I had something to do with the success of it. I had nothing to do with it though, it was and will always be God. He worked through ordinary people to do extraordinary things, he brought people together that would remain friends to this day. You know Steph Mox that I have talked about on this site in the past? She was the beginning, she was the glue that held our group together and continues to shine in ways I could only dream of. Her husband’s light combined with hers has reached places that I don’t know if I’ll ever see in my lifetime. I took a different route, one that not many college graduates take in life, the path of a custodian. When you think of grand jobs, I guarantee you never think of a custodian as one of those jobs. It’s a job of little thanks, lots of messes and lots of just blah. It’s the perfect job for someone who needs to learn how to serve others without getting praised for it. Because of “Cru”, I had acquired the taste of serving others. It was something that I felt as a “Christ-like” person, I should be good at doing and strive to do more often. The thing is, I really really like praise, I really really enjoy awards and the pride of making things happen. That, my friends, is why I am who I am today. I am not a good person, but instead I struggle with pride. To the point where I get literally angry if other people don’t understand how good I am and if they can’t be as good as I am, then to (heck) with them. I don’t deserve this life and I don’t deserve the great things that have happened to my life. I am a sinner in need of a savior and my life is a total mess. But, that’s where my faith starts to shine through. I know that Jesus died for me, and I know that with his strength and through Him I may find a light that has always extinguished the darkness within me. He opened my eyes to the needs of the world and given me the jobs to accomplish those needs. I have one wish, one real dream….. that is that at the end of my life, I will have an overflowing funeral with those who I have helped in one way or another. You may not understand and that’s quite alright, I don’t understand it either. I do understand one thing though, that’s that I have been given everything in life so that I may use it to help others. I don’t always like helping others or doing what I have to do to help them, I complain all the time at work because of it and swear a lot because of it. But, in the end of the day, when I remember the scriptures that have been instilled in me, I remember that it doesn’t matter what I want or how I feel….it just matters that His glory be seen and His will be done. I started a ministry fund in college, since than I have added to it and when I prayed for a sustainable way to add to it, God answered me. I became poor. Well, to some they said I was poor, I never felt poor because I had everything still. But, through that, I picked up a second part-time job and a week or so later, got Full-time at my main part-time job. Being full-time allowed me to get back on my feet with that paycheck and live off of that paycheck, making my second part-time paycheck open to be used to grow my ministry fund. After a year or so of being full-time, that’s exactly what I did. I have been blessed with being able to sponsor four kids, donate to a survival program for newborn babies, and do countless other things with the money that I have earned. The greatest joy in life doesn’t come from owning gadgets and gizmos and the latest technology, it comes from getting letters from kids and hearing about how you are changing their lives. I am a horrible person, a worldly person, but God has used me to do extraordinary things. I will never deserve it, I will never be able to earn it, but it was a free gift that was given to me and I cherish it more than life itself. Cleaning toilets for a living just got a new appreciation from me, it allows God to work through me and it allows Him to teach me how to shed this pride and depend SOLELY on Him. Every hardship sheds new light on how powerful God is and the magnificent things he can accomplish if you put your trust in Him. I pray you will give Him a chance as I have and see if he can spark a flame within you that will burn bright and be Radiant.